More job woes

Bounced by an eager jobs agent into going to an interview at a great big private school tomorrow. Nooooooooo! I don't want it..... Please don't make me go.....

Madness in Cambridge University

If anyone reads this and loves Portuguese, please, please sign the petition opposed to the dropping of Portuguese Language in the Modern Languages Department at Cambridge University. It just impacts on so many other areas of the University - including Latin American Studies, Film and science - think of work in the Amazon, Africa - Angola and Mozambique, and East Asia. Plus there are loads of Portuguese speaking potential students in East Anglia - the children of the migrant workers there. Or maybe Cambridge isn't interested in social inclusion ?
www.petitiononline.com//portsACP/-

Lucky Blogging

So I read my e-mail. And the recruitment people offering the tacky job have withdrawn my interview. Thank God! And then my application for an intern say I'm over qualified, but can they discuss the results with me in September ?!!! Might be positive?? I will take it as such. Anyway now I have to go and pick up nephew. And have added one of a group of inspirational blogs - see left, from Yvette Perry which discusses the question of 'egocasting' which is rather the same as cv writing and job interviewing. E.g. Which persona fits today??? So another time to consider my blog ethics. With maturity comes caution.... but you know fear is still there how ever old your life.

I had a dream about my father's house in New Zeland this morning, because it has been sold becuase he is in care elsewhere. I spent a lot of time there last year. Because there was a lot of family trouble, which as the eldest I sought of tried to fix - but you know I live in England. Anyway dream - I was in the 'living room' which once years ago was my bedroom and on my knees taking out some papers I left there last year from a old cabinet there. And the front door (which was rarely used) unlocked and my brother and his wife came in to say my father was dead. He isn't - I checked, but it was a way of saying his independence is over. Didn't notice it was weighing so heavy on my mind. But there you are. There is more interpretation but not for publication. So setting up the barriers.

Updating my stupidity over perfectionism

Well I am facing defeat in the face over my dissertation. Spent most of the month writing and re-writing a review which turned into an essay over the second film of my director Claudio Assis which is called Baixio das Bestas (Bog of Beasts) which I saw at Rotterdam. Both are unfinished. I have seen my professor twice and handed nothing in and this is the last week of term. How weak is that?
So I think he will give up on me.
I have applied for various jobs, and only have an interview for one so badly paid and junior that I must be completely stir-crazy to even consider it - and the temporary relocation to London that it would involve.
I actually spent most of the month writing diary like entries of pure angst too terrible to put up here.
Question. What does a mental breakdown look like?
Positive notes. I have just signed up to take a course on Latin American Film taken at the lovely Arts Cinema here at Cambridge. It will be taught by Sarah who is writing a PhD on the Peruvian Film Industry. She is going to show some of the Brazilian Cinema Novo films that I need to see. Problem: It costs £60 which I do not have.
And I have been sent an invitation to a conference in Rio with the Brazilian Film Studies Students for October which is a huge incentive if only I had written anything worthwhile !
So I am going to go and have a cup of tea. Then I am going to look at my e-mails and send some off befor 5. And then I am going to do some work. And stop crying.
And then see if my nephew wants to go to his German lesson in Ely, which I usually spend talking to a wonderful retired Maths professor called Prof. Maude. And I will tell you about him another time.